Friday, March 20, 2009

Prodigal

All this Time
I was Ignorant
to the concept
Of Waste.

I thought Coming Back
Coming Home, or
Just showing Up
Was all I had to do.

How Wrong I was!
I suppose, that;
for a very Select Few,
Showing Up is all
that Is expected of them.

But what is True for Me
is, and Truly always has been:
'To whom Much is Given,
Much is Expected'

When I think of all
I have taken for Granted;
of 
All I have been given
And let Lay to Waste,
I see that 
I didn't almost Die back there,
I had, quite Literally,
Buried myself Alive....

Some of the things I did
or the decisions I made
weren't All for waste --
After All,
I learned more about Love
I learned a lot about Patience
I learned how Fear can freeze you
I Learned A Lot ...

But the Worst decision
I made
is the one
That I made
Over and Over again:
 -- Not to leave
When it was Time
and the Door had been Opened --

////

I can Clearly remember 4 times
that I decided Not to Go
But I realize there were More.
Times when it would have been easier than
Certainly it was this time.

But then I wouldn't have
Learned what I know Right Now
And I wouldn't have Met Her ...
Who has Made all the Difference in Each of My Days.

Prodigal.
I thought it meant
'Returning'
or,
'To Return'
It Doesn't.

It Means:
'To be Wasteful'
or,
'One who Is wasteful'.

So now,
Now that I have pulled Away
Completely,
And explained as Honestly and as
Gently as Anyone possibly Could Have;
I Know.
I Finally Get it.
I get That it is not good enough
To have just Accomplished That
And to have Simply returned
To my Family --

I must Now
Give Back
by Living my Life
By Utilizing the gifts
That I've been Given
To touch, heal, serve and comfort
Others.
I, now, must shepherd my Gifts
and be a good Steward
of the Wealth that Lies at my Feet.

I will Continue to Return --
But Prodigal,
I will Be No More.

(c)2009jsblankenship

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